Three Little Monkeys

When Jason and I had two children, we had a pretty cozy little life. I was able to do so many things with the boys that I enjoyed doing and I didn't know it at the time, but looking back, I can see that I thought I had a pretty good handle on this whole parenting thing. I thought I had the marriage thing pretty well figured out as well.

I really didn't think that much could change that. If you had asked me if I thought there was ever a chance of Jason and I having huge obstacles to overcome in our marriage, I think I would have pretty confidently said no.

I've said it before, and I'll say it again, but three was the magic number for me! In this short season of having sweet Sarah in our lives, God has broken me in so many ways of my self-sufficiency and pride. I no longer feel as though I have all the answers to parenting. I no longer think that I can control my kids and be the world's best momma. I no longer think that homeschooling will be easy and smooth.

I have felt in the most tangible way EVER that I cannot do anything in my own strength and wisdom. I NEED THE LORD.

I remember telling a friend of mine, "well, if we have three kids and it's beyond my abilities, that's ok, becuase it just means I will have to depend on the Lord more." Boy, is that ever the truth?! It is so true, so true.

And I am here to tell you that it has been a WONDERFUL thing.  Absolutely amazing. Being SO aware of my dependency on Jesus has been so freeing. It has made me a more compassionate person and it has drawn me closer to my father in Heaven. It has forced me to hand each of my children, and my marriage, over to the Lord on a daily basis.  An hourly basis. It's beyond me. I am incapable of building a strong family and strong children. I really am. I mess up in so many ways. But you know what, it's ok, because God comes through. He fills the gaps and He works miracles. He also gives the the strength, energy, and ability to keep on going at this thing called life. He teaches me, He puts people in my life to encourage me, and He equips me. And when I mess up, He graciously forgives me, and helps me to learn from my mistakes and to move on.

So my challenge to you is to ask yourself if you've got it all under control. Do you feel as though you have a good handle on your kids and marriage? Do you think you've got it in the bag? If you do, maybe you could ask God to help you in that area. It's hard, it's hard to feel in over your head, but to be completely dependent on the Lord, is the best gift ever.

I love my three little monkeys and the way they have stretched my faith in so many ways. I am so thankful for the gift of raising them, and I am so thankful to know that they are actually my father in Heavens children.  He loves them more than I do, with a love that is perfect and pure. He wants good things for them and He has a plan for them.  Thank you Lord for the gift of raising and training these precious souls.  Help me to do well by them and to point them to you.