Sex

I have been thinking about sex a lot lately.

I know what you guys are thinking, "lucky for Jason."  But that's not why I have been thinking about it.  It probably has something to do with this powerful testimony I just read.  Or this song that I love.  Or there's the book of Hosea that I had the honor of studying a few years ago with some girls and it rocked my legalistic way of thinking.  Then there's my friend that is going to write soon about the affair in her marriage.  And there's my other friend who has overcome an addiction to pornography through the power of Jesus Christ.  There's also this ministry I stumbled across.

I lost my virginity at a young age.  It makes me sad and I wish it weren't so.  I know that sex can be abused and that the effects of it are painful. 

Looking back, I know that I had sex at such a young age because I was looking for love in all the wrong places.  It sounds cliche, but it's true.  I desired to be accepted, loved...needed.


Now I am married and I see sex through a different lens.  Its an expression of love that is sacred.  I can't imagine having my heart broken in such a way.  Here's the thing though...Jesus does it for us.

We do it to Him.  Some of us choose to never make a commitment to Him at all, instead we sleep around with other gods.  Others of us make the commitment, but then we cheat.  We try and do things behind His back.

And He keeps on loving us.  He loves us still, even when we are unfaithful.  And even when we won't commit.  It's unfathomable.  This love that He has for us is so unrelenting and unapologetic that it sometimes brings me to tears.

I realize that THIS is the love I have been searching for.  His love that never wavers no matter what I do.  Even if it is something as hideous as adultery.  Why do I sometimes doubt His love for me?  Or my "right" to be loved by Him when He has promised to never break off his relationship with me??  And it's not because I earned it.

We all want to be perfectly loved and accepted.  The beautiful secret that so many of us have yet to hold on to is that we are.  We are perfectly loved and accepted.

We just look for it in all the wrong places.

Some of us get married and we think we have finally found the person that will love us perfectly and completely.  And then they don't.  They see our ugly parts and they point them out.  Or maybe they don't point them out, but we become even more self-concious of them because we know we've been caught. 

So we look elsewhere.  We look elsewhere for love.

In walks adultery.  Maybe it's not sex with another person.  Maybe it's an emotional affair.  Or maybe it's an affair with pornography. 

In our flesh, it seems almost impossible to forgive for such a thing, but God does it everyday.  He loves us that much.  Unbelievable.

So what do you say we do our best to tap into God's everlasting flow of love that He has for us?  Let's start looking for love in all the right places. 

I have a feeling good things could happen...